What's It Taste Like? by Kimi Miller

“Taste and see that the Lord is good; blessed is the man who takes refuge in him.” Psalm 34:8

When I was little, my Gramma was always “encouraging” me to try new foods.  Luckily, I had two older sisters to try it first, so I could ask them, “What’s it taste like?”  (Not like their facial expressions and gag reflexes wouldn’t give it away…), but most times, I ended up really liking it.  Older now, I appreciate my Gramma’s encouragement to try  new things…hence my reason for an overflowing plate of EVERYTHING at our life group social the other night!  How will I know if I like something or not, if I don’t try it?

But recently, I discovered something very new to me, and very refreshing.  REAL relationships with real people.  I have mentioned before how God is persuading me to trust HIM and love people, and folks, I gotta tell you, this is the best thing I’ve tasted so far!  Through trusting Jesus, I have found a freedom I’ve never known.  And while I thought my problem was in trusting others, my real issue was trusting myself.   

For those that have known me, it was probably easy to see through my façade.  I often hid behind a plastic smile and cautioned eyes.  I was hesitant to allow anyone too close, because I was afraid if they knew who I was, they wouldn’t like me.  So, I kept everyone at arm’s length. 

But last year, I reached a point where I just couldn’t do it anymore.  And I fell…hard.  Not physically, but emotionally and spiritually.  I had reached the point where I didn’t want to be this “fake” person anymore.  I wanted to know what real was.  And I wanted to feel it.  And I wanted to be it.   

So, I did what most of us do when we are feeling “out of sorts”…I isolated myself.  I disengaged from most of my “church” activities and friends and acquaintances…and family.  But, I walked down this road because I knew that’s where God was leading me.  You see, I had put all of these distractions around me, to keep me from coming too close to the one I was really afraid of…God.  I mean, I knew I was this broken mess, but how could anyone – even God – put me back together and use me for His kingdom?

I knew in my heart it was time to talk to God…about everything.  And not only was it time for me to talk with Him, but most important it was time for me to listen.  I realized I couldn’t hear God, because the noise around me was too loud.  I needed to take some time to just sit in His lap and hear what He wanted to whisper into my heart.  The Bible tells us that, “Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed” (Luke 5:16); I knew this was one of those times when God was asking me to do the same.    

Over the last ten months, although it has been challenging at times, God has transformed my mind…and my heart.  As I began to trust God with small things, He would often reciprocate in the form of love.  He opened my eyes to see people as He sees them – fleshy human beings designed with a hole in their hearts that only He can fill – people longing and looking to be accepted and loved…people just like me. 

As I began to really taste what God wanted me to try, I realized what I had been missing out on…a whole smorgasbord of life!  Through the work He is doing in my heart, God is revealing to me how truly treasured I am to Him.  He has surrounded me with an amazing life group – which really feels more to me like a family.  And He’s opened my eyes to see that what I was looking for all along, was right in front of me – a wonderful church community that will love me and support me in my calling. 

As I rest in His assurance, I see now that God offers us a “taste”, because He knows we will be back for more. 

Oh yes, God is that good!  Taste and see for yourself!  For blessed is the man who takes refuge in Him.

Hi Daddy,

Thank you for encouraging me to “taste” Your goodness!  You always have the stuff kids like me enjoy, but even better – what we need.  Please continue the work You have started in me, so others will look at me and only see You.  I love You.
Amen

The Name Game

“He determines the number of the stars and calls them by name.” Psalm 147:4

First, you may have noticed I changed the title of my blog from Daily Devotions to Reflections (actually, for about 10 minutes yesterday morning it was Refelctions before I noticed my typo… a little advice – don’t try typing before your first cup of coffee :) …)  I changed the name, because, if you look at my track record, you’ll see my postings haven’t been exactly “daily”…

Living Reflections is the title of my drama ministry because I want people to catch a glimpse into someone else’s life, or maybe see something deeper in their own.  I want them to see themselves in my art, and reflect on what God is whispering to them through my ministry.  It seemed only fitting that my own “reflections” on my life and God’s Word should be titled the same.  (Anyway, that’s why the name change, in case you were curious… plus I was beginning to get too wrapped up in posting something every day versus something real.  Thanks for letting me ramble… I love you!)

I am fascinated by names.  Now, it doesn’t mean I’m great with names, in fact, I really (REALLY) stink with names.  I don’t know if it’s something that has just gotten worse as I’ve gotten older, or if it’s the fact that I have the attention span of a gnat (I’m guessing it’s the latter of the two). But even though I’m lousy at remembering names, it’s cool to know God isn’t. 

Psalm 147 tells us, “He determines the number of stars and calls them by name.”  Did you catch that?  The stars, people!  If God cares about the names of the stars, how much more He must care for us to call each of us by name.

 I wonder if the unique name of our soul is what the Spirit whispers when we are lost.  Jesus says, “He leads his own sheep by name and leads them out…and his sheep follow him because they know his voice.” (John 10:3,4) He calls us by name, and we know His voice.  How cool is that?! 

This last weekend, at the She Speaks conference I attended, they had posted the many names of God.  After praying over every lady’s name in attendance, they placed her name on the name of God to which they were led.  My name was placed by El Olam – The Eternal God, The Everlasting God.  “The One who works His purpose throughout the ages.”  It made me realize, I am here…for such a time as this.

What is God’s name for you today?  Whatever we need Him to be, He can be for us.  We only need to call out to the One that saves, the Lord of Lords and King of Kings…Jesus.

Dear Daddy,

Thank You for knowing my name.  Thank You for calling out to me in a voice that speaks to my soul, and restores my faith.  Please cover me with Your peace today, and talk with me throughout my day. Help me to listen, Father, to the only voice that matters…Yours.
I ask all of this in Your Holy Name,
Amen

What name does the Father call you by? Cherished? Loved? Chosen? Beloved?  Wouldn't it be cool to catch a glimpse of the names God calls us by?  If you so feel led, please post the name by which God is calling you today.

"Are You There?" by Kimi Miller

“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9
 

“Piglet sidled up to Pooh from behind. "Pooh?" he whispered.
"Yes, Piglet?"
"Nothing," said Piglet, taking Pooh's hand. "I just wanted to be sure of you.” ― A.A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh

Every time I read this quote from Winnie-the-Pooh, it touches my heart.  It makes me think of my son, who sometimes, after I have tucked him in bed and have made my way back to the living room to finish my TV show or read my book, hollers out, “Mom?” 

“What do you need, Jacob?”

“Nothing. I just wanted to make sure you were still there. Can you leave the hallway light on?”

Can I be honest with you?  Sometimes, I get annoyed when Jacob asks me this question.

I feel horrible about admitting that, but it’s the truth.  Most times, I’m irritated because I’m so focused on myself and what I’m trying to accomplish, that I don’t want to be interrupted.  And sometimes it’s just because I’m “done” – done with answering questions, done with picking up after everyone, done with a messy house, done with paying for lights left on when no one is in the room, done with myself…just…done.

So, my response is anything but gracious and giving.  Huffy and puffy, I tromp down the hall and flip the switch, “There.” 

“Thanks, Mom.  I love you.”

And that little voice breaks me.  It breaks my selfishness and my huffy-puffy attitude, and reminds me how “big” my son thinks I am, and how small I often feel. 

Humbled, I sigh. “I love you, too, baby.”

I wonder how many times our own “fleshy” reactions influence our image of God?  How many times do we long to be reminded of God’s presence, but are afraid to ask because we fear He will react like we do?  (I mean, He is running the universe here, it’s not like He’s just trying to get back to His TV show or a good book!)  But I often wonder, how many times do our own feelings and our own responses shape in our mind what we think God must surely be thinking?  And even though I know God LOVES to hear from me and be with me, sometimes, it’s hard to believe.

I wonder if I am the only one who sometimes wonders if God is “done” with me.  Not “done” like in a good way – like, “Finally she’s got it!”, but more of a “done” like I get with my own kids, like, “Really? We need to have this conversation again?! I just told you this! You’re killing Me, Smalls!” 

But I know that is not true. 

For my God promises that He is with me, and for me.  It pleases Him to know I long for Him – that I want nothing more than to know He is near!  (Now, I’m not saying that He probably hasn’t rolled His eyes at me, or held His head in His hand while sighing heavily at me from time to time, but I know He’s not done with me.)  He is with me wherever I go.  Always present, always loving, and forever patient, even when I just need Him to turn the Light on for me…just to be sure.
 

Dear Father,

Thank you for being an amazing Dad.  Thank you for never losing your temper with me, and for always answering when I call.  Thank you for being patient enough to reassure me of Your love – every time I need it (because sometimes I’m pretty needy).  Please help me to believe, even when it feels like I can’t.
I love you.
Amen

Nervous Nelly

“Don't fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God's wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It's wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.”  Philippians 4:6 (The Message)

My husband and I often refer to our fat lab, Molly, as “Nervous Nelly”.  She is always fidgety and anxious, and if she even thinks she’s missing out on something, she starts to bark and squirm in a nervous tapping dance. Every morning, when I put on my walking shoes, Nervous Nelly’s anxiety kicks in and the “talking back” and fretful dance begins…

I wonder, how many times do I act like a Nervous Nelly?  How many times do I dance around in a nervous tizzy because I think I know what’s coming?  Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with being excited, but there is a problem with being anxious.

Anxiety is defined as distress or uneasiness of mind caused by fear of danger or misfortune.  How many times have I felt distress or uneasiness of mind?  Unfortunately, more times than I care to admit.  Just last night, I found myself struggling to fall asleep because of the worry running through my head – worry about things I had no control over, but things that affected me and the ones I love.  I tossed and turned in my own little worry dance, “barking” internally over the turmoil in my mind.

Then, I thought of this verse, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.” 

I realized at that moment there was nothing I could do to change the things that were keeping me awake.  There was nothing I could do or say that would instantly “fix” the problems that twirled in my head and troubled my heart.  The only peace I could find would be found in Christ. 

I had a choice to make at that point.  I could continue to focus on my circumstances and lose myself in fear and doubt, or I could turn to prayer.  I could acknowledge the One greater than myself, the One who sees more than I can envision, knows more than I can imagine, and loves deeper than I can fathom.  I could find rest – if I wanted it – I just had to let go of the counterfeit apprehensions trying to steal my peace.

It’s when we focus on Christ, that we truly begin to see with opened eyes what is in our own capacity to influence and what is not.  I love the way The Message captures this verse, “Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God's wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It's wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.”  (Phil 4:6, emphasis mine)

When we truly turn our eyes on Jesus, and allow pure admiration and awe of God to consume our thoughts, the weight of our troubles begins to diminish.  Our problems, situations, and circumstances don’t change or disappear… but our worry is replaced by Peace.  Trusting Him to hear our prayers is the only way to find rest for our uneasy mind and broken heart.    

Dear Jesus,

Sometimes it’s difficult for me to trust that You have everything under control, even when I know You do.  Please help me to keep my eyes fixed on You, even when nothing else seems to make sense.  Thank You for hearing the cries of my heart, and listening to prayers.  Please cover me with Your peace so I may find rest for my mind and wellness for my soul. 

In Your Precious Name,

Amen

Potty Mouth

“Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them.” Ephesians 4:29 (NLT)

The joy of potty training.  My little nephew is learning to go “pee-pee” on the potty.  Every hour, my sister runs him to the bathroom, strips him down and puts him on the pot, hoping to catch him before it’s too late.  With great determination and focus, that little boy wills any ounce he can out of himself, and when he is successful, he and his momma shout, “Yay! Pee-pee!”  Oh, the words that encourage!

But how many times do our words do the opposite?  How many times do the expressions from our mouths destroy the joy and hope of others?  How many times, without even thinking, do we allow our tempers or egos to determine what falls from our lips?  While it is true no man can tame the tongue, it doesn’t give us the excuse to be careless with our words.

As a mom of two young boys myself, I can regretfully recall the times I failed to use encouraging words.  I remember seeing the pain in their eyes as my cruel tone and imprudent words crushed their spirit.  I never intended to hurt them – or anyone I loved – but I allowed my emotional, physical, and mental exhaustion to dictate my tongue.  I wanted to give my boys support and build them up, but hasty comments and senseless words often did the opposite. 

It’s incredible to think how much power our words contain.  They can be used to shape and mold a person or situation, and they can be used to tear someone down, or build someone up.  What’s scarier to ponder, is the idea that our words influence those around us, even when they are not directed at that person.  How many times do I speak poorly of others in front of my children – or anyone for that matter?  How many times do I allow garbage to spew from my mouth – like my opinion is the only one that matters?  How many times did God present me with an opportunity to use words that would build, but instead, I chose words that left someone feeling empty and worthless? 

What if instead, I took the time to think about my words before I opened my mouth?  What if I made a point to choose my words more carefully?  What if I truly appreciated the power my words possessed?  What if, in those moments when I’m exhausted, frustrated, hurt, and angry, instead of opening my mouth to let out words of destruction, I bite my tongue?  What if, in those instances, instead of thinking I know best, I shut my mouth and pray instead?

The Bible says, “Watch the way you talk. Let nothing foul or dirty come out of your mouth. Say only what helps, each word a gift.” Ephesians 4:29 (The Message)  I love the last part of this verse, “each word a gift”.  What if we began choosing our words more meticulously – the way we do when we are choosing a gift for a loved one?  What would our world begin to look like?

If I could give you one gift today, simply by the words I use, would that gift build you up and make you feel encouraged?  If not, what is it in my heart that needs to change?  Jesus said, “But the things that come out of the mouth come from the heart…” (Matthew 15:18).  Ouch.

I know it’s difficult to bite our tongues or hold back our frustration, but that is what God is calling us to do.  He has given us the means to support one another and build each other up, just by the power of our words.  Imagine how our words could inspire those around us…even when we think others aren’t listening.  “Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.” Proverbs 16:24.

Dear Jesus,

Please forgive me for the times when my words are unkind.  Please help me to recognize the power of my words and teach me to use only language that encourages and builds others up.  I know I cannot do this on my own, but trust that You will intervene in those moments when I can’t control my own tongue.  Thank You for loving me…potty mouth and all.  Please continue to work in my heart, so that others will see the good work you have started in me.
Amen

I Will Sing, Sing, Sing!

“My heart is steadfast, O God; I will sing and make music with all my soul.”  Psalm 108:1

Have you ever belted out the lyrics (or at least what you thought were the lyrics) to a song while driving in your car?  I mean, all out air drums, power mic, scrunched up face – the kind of singing where you’re not just singing the song, you are the song!  And even if you haven’t ever held your own one-man-band solo concert in a car on the highway, you have to admit, when you see someone else doing it, you have to laugh.  Trust me, I’ve seen people’s reactions to my amazing rendition of Air Supply’s, Making Love Out of Nothing At All, at stoplights.  When you see “crazies” like me, harmonizing (I’d like to think that it sounds that way) in their cars, you have to think to yourself, “Dude! That girl (or guy) is really jammin’!”  (What’s even better is when you have the same radio song on in your car and you know exactly what they’re jammin’ to!)

I love those times when I am that carefree, I just let loose and enjoy the moment.  I think that’s the kind of carefree singing and music making David is talking about.  The kind where we don’t really care what others think, because the joy in our soul is so overwhelming, it releases all inhibitions and makes us want to sing.  I think God likes those moments, too.

I know it’s difficult to be joyful when things seem so glum around you.  But I think those are the times when God is singing over us – watching over us, and loving us through it.  Paul writes in Galatians, “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.” (5:22).  Oh, what joy to know the love of the Lord!

I doubt that Jesus queues up his iPod with some cool jams – that’s what the angels are for!  But I bet there is nothing sweeter to His ears than hearing our songs of worship and praise, and our cries for mercy and rescue.  Even if you can’t carry a tune, you have to know this…it all sounds beautiful to Him. 

Dear Heavenly Father,

Thank You for the gift of joy!  Please help me to be carefree - to lay my burdens down and lift Your name up.  Help me to let loose and simply enjoy the moment knowing You are truly in control.  Help me to stop worrying about what others think, so I can sing, sing, sing and make music just for You.
In Your wonderful, amazing name,
Amen. 

While It Is Still Dark

“She gets up while it is still dark; she provides food for her family and portions for her servant girls.” Proverbs 31:15

It was still dark this morning when I went for my walk (yup, kind of like it is EVERY morning I go for a walk…), but as I was strolling along – yes, I said strolling...it was the chunky lab’s turn to walk today – I thought of this verse. Now keep in mind, this was one of those mornings when I was really wondering why on earth I was out here in the dark, at five-something in the morning, walking my fat yellow lab!  But as this verse came to mind, I began reflecting about what it means and what it looks like to get up while it is still dark.

How many times have you found yourself in a dark place?  A feeling of hopelessness?  How many times have you found yourself in circumstances that feel as if they are absent of light?  Gloomy, murky, and bleak. 

Maybe for you, it’s easier to ignore the “dark” than to even think about admitting it’s there – let alone attempt walking through it.  Like if you even begin to think about it, you will break and not find the will to face another moment. 

Maybe your conditions are so bad, that you simply exist through the day – not really putting effort into anything, and really wondering how things could ever get better. 

Maybe you are battling an illness that prevents you from doing the things you want.

Maybe you just feel like nobody understands.

Maybe, like me, you battle with depression. 

Or maybe… maybe you just feel “blah”.

This is the “dark” I was pondering about… and yet, “She gets up while it is still dark…”

She doesn’t give up.  She doesn’t stay in bed.  She doesn’t lie there in despair.  She gets up. That kind of strength and courage must only come from God.  I know for me, there’s no other way I could muster through “The Pit”, if it were not for the grace and power of God. 

He said to Paul, “My grace is sufficient for you, my power is made perfect in weakness…” (2 Cor. 12:9). 
 

What if those dark moments are necessary to bring us to our knees?  The moments where we feel so low that getting up is the last thing we want to do - what if those moments are what it takes to bring us to the feet of the Most High King?  Maybe those times are necessary so that everyone who sees us – in our desolation and darkness – knows that it is not by our own strength that we press on, but only by the grace of God. 

Because that is what a woman of faith does.  She gets up while it is still dark – even when there is no break of dawn in the distance, she gets up.  She doesn’t complain about her circumstances, or compare herself to others.  No, she simply gets up, and trusts that there is One who can see through the dark – see her in the midst of her turmoil – and not leave her, but instead guide her through it.  

That’s why, even when others cannot see why, she gets up.

Dear Jesus,
Thank you for being my light in times of darkness. Thank you for your grace that grants me the strength to continue on – even when I think I can’t.  Thank you for your loving presence, and please help me to see You – the light – when darkness settles in.  Thank you for hearing my prayer.
In your precious name,
Amen